Congratulations to John & Laura on the birth of your little bundle of joy!

Why is it that when wearing an all white outfit - liquid seems to fall from the sky? First a kid spilled his bright red juice on the table and luckily I managed to jump out of the way right before it would have poured all over my linen skirt... then my daughter grabbed my coffee cup and spilled coffee all over the same table. That time I couldn't get out of the way, and ended up having to wash said skirt in my cousins kitchen sink, with her husband ever so helpfully offering to help ;-) I want to wish all Mothers a happy and relaxing day tomorrow. And note to self.. don't wear white.

I am sick and tired of hearing 'people' spout about how it's "OK that Polar Bears become extinct because hey we'll be extinct one day too". It's natural. Or how it's alright for Eskimo tribes in Northern Alaska to hunt and kill one type of whale "for food" - when these guys walk around in designer sunglasses and the latest Rei gear. And there are only 8000 of the type of whale left in the whole of the Arctic Ocean. I will never apologise for my belief that it is not OK for us - humans - to cause extinction. I wish there was a happy medium in getting the word out. On one hand there's the Liberal BStters and crazed animal rights groups, that make everybody want to turn a blind eye just to escape their crap. On the other side you have the people like my husband, Conservatives who believe in hunting and the right to bare arms, and believe global warming is a normal part of the "story" of this planet. And of course neither side agree on anything, so where does that leave the animals? For the most part on the decline, and there's not a damn thing anyone can do, because they're all too busy arguing about politics. Rant over.

One thing I miss terribly about Scotland, is being close to my 3 brothers. I don't have a get-out-guy anymore. I don't have anyone I can call at anytime and say "pick me up - I need to just sit a while". I miss having someone who'll drive me to look out point, without there being any strings attached. That's the thing about moving yourself 3000 miles from home - you have to get used to the fact that you are on your own. I've always felt like a caged animal in the sense that sometimes I want to be set free, even just for an hour or so. And that's what I miss about having my brothers and friends around me - I have no where to run to.

Have you ever looked up at the sky and imagined what's beyond it? Sometimes I stare above and think wow - we're on a planet, on the face of this round globe and beyond is vast and endless. I look at the moon and am awestruck by the fact it's there, always there, shining on. The stars are like magical fairies flickering away. And they are trillions of miles away. I also think what's beneath me, not the hardwood floors or the grass. Below that. The earth. The core. I often ponder on the size of the oceans. I think what it would be like if you scooped all the water out and how big the Atlantic really is. There are millions upon millions of people who go about their everyday lives, and they never in their whole life stop to think of anything other than the daily grind. They don't see the bigger picture. And I feel sorry for them. Because as much as the thought of these things scare me, they also enthrall me with their possibilities and mysteries.

My son broke my nose on Sunday. He's 2 - he's allowed. Today is the first day I've been able to breathe without my eyes watering, so all is good. Praise to my myspace friend Olivia De Berardinis who is definitely the best modern day pin-up artist there is.

I read today that a new company has released a test to determine the sex of a baby just 6 weeks into the pregnancy. There's been another company doing this test for years, so I don't know why this is headline, but hey.. I also read the many objections to this, based on a worry that people will abort based on the baby being a boy or a girl. While I understand that concern, I think it's fantastic that this kind of science is available to regular Joes in the comfort of their own home. We'll be having another one soon, and I am all for dropping $250 to find out! For me finding out the sex was the highlight of my pregnancies. I am terrible at waiting for anything and love to get excited about names, new baby clothes and playing out how that baby will interact with our existing children. Today I wish all the luck in the world to Byron and Lincoln Ryman born eleven weeks premature. Although they were born within a minute of each other, firstborn Byron weighed 3lb 6oz and Lincoln weighed only 1lb 2oz. Yesterday the pair, who are now just over five weeks old, were doing well, thanks to the wonderful staff at the Royal Hospital for Women in Sydney. The Daily Mail in the UK has the story and the truly amazing pics. I also want to send my prayers for the safe return of little Madeleine McCann, a British girl aged 3 who is feared kidnapped from a holiday complex in Portugal. If you've read the story you'll know that the parents left her and her younger twin siblings alone in their bedroom while they ate at the restaurant on the complex. While I think the parents were crazy for doing that, I don't wish losing a child on anyone.

On this day in 1707 England, Wales & beautiful, magical Scotland were united to form Great Britain. Now I'm not saying it was the biggest mistake ever, but ;-) Also today in 1883 Buffalo Bill had his first Wild West Show! Yee haw... Did you know Dukes of Hazards General Lee is for sale on ebay? If you have a spare $3m then go for it - I love that car! UPDATE make that a spare $9,901,001.00 and with 3 hours to go, possibly a lot more!

I feel so happy today. This morning I saw the first bumble bees of the year, my Mum confirmed she’s coming over in 3 weeks, the blossom fell from my giant tree and left bright green leaves, and I reread Charlottes Web yesterday. Here is one of my favorite paragraphs: “The barn was very large. It was very old. It smelled of hay and it smelled of manure. It smelled of the perspiration of tired horses and the wonderful sweet breath of patient cows. It often had a sort of peaceful smell – as though nothing bad could happen ever again in the world.” This for me evokes vivid memories of my childhood, and brings my love of the countryside flooding right back. But today in this lovely Spring weather, with my summer bulbs 2 inches up and the blossom blowing around me - the City doesn’t look quite so bad.

It's good fishing weather - crappy. What happened to my Spring?! It's cold, rainy and a little windy damn it. The blue sky has been replaced by a dull blanket of gloom. It's dreich as we say in Scotland. But according to my husband "It can't rain all the time", and my day will certainly brighten up considerably when he comes home :-)

On a brighter, more positive note - Spring has most definitely sprung! Joy. In my tiny City garden my tulips are blazing red and orange, and my daffodils are gorgeous yellow. There are tiny blue flowers spreading all over and I have no idea what they are, but they are lovely. My butterfly bush is covered in new growth, and brings back images of last summer, when it seemed every Monarch in the neighborhood landed to feed. Most of the plants I presumed dead, now have bright green shoots and lots of buds. Oh hark I feel like singing! My huge tree in the back garden is covered in blossom, and finally, the apartment buildings behind are vanishing once again. The sky is bright blue and the sun is warm. Oh and I'm wearing a gorgeous red polka dot sun dress. I am happy.

My Mother became very ill over the weekend, to the point where she couldn't raise her head from dizziness. My cousin died from a brain hemorrhage when he was a child, so everyone sort of panicked when seeing my mum become so ill so quickly. It turned out to be a middle ear infection, and she is now recovering. She said she had awful thoughts go through her head about her Will not being up to date, and the way it was presently, the government would take most of our inheritance. Having just sold the family estate in Scotland, after the death of my Grandmother, we know all about how much the British Government gets their hands on. Capital gains, Inheritance taxes etc, - how awful that you're forced to think these thoughts on top of being worried about your family, or being just plain scared of death. The horror of it is when I worked for the Deputy Prime Minister back in the first few years of Labour being in power, they were rumoured to have millions of pounds of collected taxes sitting in accounts, that they had no clue what to do with. Bring back the Conservatives - where have all the Churchill's gone? Even Thatcher is an angel compared to the Blair witch. Rant over.

So my weekend in the country was a little different than expected. Instead of gaining happiness from my sales, I was happy because of the people I met. It's amusing how much fun it is to be thrown in the middle of people you would ordinarily never meet in your daily life. To my right I had the good old Irish/Italian/German/Americans, waiting for their grandchildren to come. Lovely people with interesting stories. Sad stories, the death of 1 of their 5 children. Great stories, of the lady taking time out of her career to raise all of her children at home, and her strong beliefs that I was doing the right thing working from home, in order to raise mine. She ran a cheesecake business during those years, and look at me and my love of the cheesecake art? Totally different but yet the same. Stories of their trips to England, and losing all the photos they took in the x-ray machine at the airport. They said how quaint my accent is, and how funny the word differences are. Then to my left, the "country" biker folks y'all. The man was in his late 40s with children varying from 30 years old right down to 18 and several grandchildren. Plaid shirts abound. He was selling hunting gear, gun cabinets and the like. He had a full table of back issues of Easy Rider. He talked excitedly about all the party's he'd been to where he had picked up those magazines, and quite a few girls along the way. I was captivated. I loved the way he talked so passionately about the bikes, the hunting, the life. He was pure country. I felt at home, even though sometimes we couldn't understand a word either of us were saying. I told him of my love for Harley's. So he told me all the ins and outs of getting the right one, where to go, who to trust, what to look for. He showed me centerfolds in those magazines of pictures drawn by an artist who died recently. He spoke of them like they were Monet, or Vargas for that matter. His eyes were alive. Some people label guys like him "red-necks". They call them uneducated and they are portrayed in comedy sketches like Larry the cable guy, as being dumb. But to me for the most part, people like him are people who are dedicated to working to live, and not stuck in the rat race of living to work. That's important you know. Why is it that every week I am thrown a new hurdle in my struggle to like City life? I miss not caring what time it is. I miss fields and trees. On Saturday night we went for a twilight stroll. We came across a fat frog sitting on the road. We closely examined it with my husbands flashlight, I want to say torch, but don't want anyone thinking I go around with a flaming beacon of any kind ;-) Anyway we presumed it dead, and as I was putting my son back in his stroller it hopped away into the hedgerow. The excitement and laughter that followed made my night! Then we came across 3 horses. We all petted them and I delighted in that long forgotten smell, of years past. It's the simple things that count in this life.

This weekend's going to be a scorcher! High 70s where I'm heading. I have my first show of the season this weekend, so I've been crazy busy all week making jewelry and printing Varga Girls, oh it's a hard life! This morning the sky is the deepest blue I've seen in a long time, it reminds me that summer's just around the corner, which is enough to make me jump for joy, or dust off my bikini at the very least.

It's 12 years ago today that the Alfred P. Murrah Federal Building in Oklahoma City, OK, was destroyed by a bomb. It was the worst bombing on U.S. territory. 168 people were killed including 19 children, and over 500 were injured. The worst part of this sentence for me is "19 children". It tears me apart. As a Scot, it brings back horrific memories of Dunblane; where a mad man shot and killed 16 young children. I know the pain shouldn't be worse, a death is a death. But the image, that won the Pulitzer prize, of the firefighter with the infant that later died, truly haunts me to the core of my existence. I see it - I cry. I have a gut wrenching feeling every time I think of it. So I try not to. Maybe because I am the mother of 3 small children. Maybe it feels more raw to me. There's a line in a System of a Down song "I cry when angels deserve to die". It gets me every time. Makes me think, but why? Angels never deserve to die. I read deeply into things that hurt me, even song lyrics that bear no meaning to what I hear them as. My heart aches for all the lost children. Today even more so.

There are less than 200,000 wolves left in the wild. Shocking right? Since I was a child wolves have been my favorite animal. Bears follow. There's something about their eyes that captivates me. I've been keeping me eye on a man amongst wolves. Shaun Ellis, a fellow Brit, lives with a pack of wolves in England. Abandoned by their Mother, he took on her role and taught them to be wild. Now honestly I can't really bear to watch him eating deer flesh alongside them, but it's so fascinating I can hardly take my eyes off it. He came up with the concept that a recording of wolves howling might be enough to keep other wolves from coming onto farmland to kill livestock. And it actually works.. so far. There's much scientific research being done, to prove this as being a valid way to combat this problem. If it proves successful, and the sceptics accept and use this method - hopefully wolf numbers will increase, as the farmers will stop shooting them.

Apparently last nights dream meant : "that I have feelings of insecurity and am going through some personal changes and I'm entering into a new phase or new area in my life. Oh and that I "feel neglected". According to a dream analysis site that is. I don't think any of this is true, but I wonder what a gypsy would say? Would she look into her crystal ball and tell me of hard times to come, emotional ones at that? When my Mother was a child she had dreams that followed on the next night. She dreamt she was a little girl living in the past, wearing "old-fashioned clothing"; she saw the house, garden and people she lived with every night for many years. Every morning she would wake up and have gone through another part of that girls life. Some people would suggest that in a previous life my Mum was that girl. When I was pregnant I would constantly dream of my husband being with one of his exes, he wasn't cheating on me with them, just walking around - happy. It killed me, because I was the most horrible pregnant woman in the world. The worst part for him was I would wake up and yell at him. I blame hormones, he blames me being Scottish! According to the analysis sites, having this dream while pregnant is caused by feelings of insecurity, and anxiety over the impending birth. Well, hey! Tell me something I don't know. I seem to always have dreams about running away from something, being chased. Apparently there may be something I am supposed to do but have been avoiding. If this proposed action is a source of fear, stress and confusion, it can sometimes manifest in my dream life as an attacker or pursuer. Instead of facing my fear, I am running from it, and the attacker in my dreams represents the thing I am trying to get away from or avoid in real life. So if I really believed in all this I would be a pretty miserable person in my waking life!

Who decided darkness was scary? I'm much more afraid of the light. Is it the sense of the unknown that exists with darkness? What you can't see won't hurt you... right? Surely daylight is more frightening, when what scares you is in full view in all it's gory detail. Who made the rain depressing? I love the rain. "It washes the $hit out of the city". I like the way it feels on my skin, and the sound it makes when it hits the window. When did thunder become something to fear? To me it's pure magic, like a dragon roaring. Why did the forest become a bad place? I grew up surrounded by trees, and to me it gave protection and shelter. Tonight when driving home from Upstate NY, we passed hundreds of thousands of trees packed tightly together, bare from winter, with darkness falling, and the 'end of winter' storm lashing them with rain and snow - it looked like Narnia out there, and it gave me butterflies.

"Now Friday came, you old wives say, Of all the week's the unluckiest day." (1656) For those of you who suffer from triskaidekaphobia, fear of the number 13th, today is not such a great day. Imagine also suffering from what I think is the longest word I've ever seen - paraskavedekatriaphobia, which is a fear of Fridays. Friday is my favourite day, and my Mother in Laws birth date is the 13th, so today is just another day for me. But for those of you who believe in all this, here are some more things to be worried about. "If you hear anything new on a Friday, it gives you another wrinkle on your face, and adds a year to your age." (1883), "If you have been ill, don't get up for the first time on a Friday." (1923), "As to Friday, a couple married on that day are doomed to a cat-and-dog life." (1879), and my favorite of all "A child born on a Friday is doomed to misfortune." (1846), - nice. Even nicer is the fact I was born on a Tuesday, meaning I'm "full of grace" - someone should have told that to my Scottish dance teacher. You would have heard her laughing the world over.

Congratulations to Rob & Lori on the birth of your beautiful baby girl. Mina - a beautiful name for an absolutely perfect angel! Having children is truly the best trip of your life. So much happiness. Enjoy her!

I really miss Scotland today. I miss it everyday, but there's something about feeling trapped that makes you long for "home". The City makes me feel that way. The big buildings jammed all around me, so many people, the grime and crime, the roaches and rats. I want to walk through a field of wildflowers, go horseback riding along the beach, sit on top of a mountain, and cry my heart out. Listen for the faintest sound of bagpipes, and the chill that comes with it. A sense of belonging. Feeling part of something much bigger than the daily. I know I made the wrong choice. Being in the big smoke is hard for a country girl. I need peace. I need to hear the birds sing. I feel lost, again.

I am so excited. This summer I'll be saying arrivederci to NYC and ciao to Italy. I'm heading to Tuscany to visit family, then on to Scotland for more of the same, but without the gelato!

Wishing you all a Happy Easter! Special mention goes out to the luckiest bunny of all, the Lower Keys Marsh Rabbit, Sylvilagus palustris hefneri,who is found in marshes in the Florida Keys from Big Pine to Boca Chica. It is known as the "playboy bunny" because its research was financed in part by the Playboy Foundation. And happy birthday to Hef himself, who celebrates being 81 years young this Monday. Also, I admit it, yes, sadly I am addicted to the Girls Next Door :-/

The attendants at the movie theater always look lost. People around them are out having fun, catching the latest flick, candy and coke in hand. Right now I feel like I'm sure they do. Life is passing me by. I feel like the wind has been knocked out of me one last time, and it's hard to find the way through the smoke. Hard to make it back from down there. Sometimes in life you're hit with a blow so strong you feel you might not recover. But then good things are happening all around you, and what are you going to do? You can't just stay caught up in your own moment. Darkness. You have to find a way to turn your light on. Clear a path through the clouds, and find your way home. The older I get, and the more blows I'm dealt, the more I realize that if at first you don't succeed try, try again - is real. And this life is the real deal, the only chance you have to keep on keeping on. So I have to give it my best shot. Plus frowning gives you wrinkles, never a good thing.

I love the smell of creosote it takes me back to when I was a child growing up in the beautiful countryside in Scotland. We had wooden fences and there’s something about that smell that comforts me. I love the smell of a workshop, the oil, the metal, the wood, reminds of my Father, back when he was my Father. Fresh hay - that quintessential musty smell of summers past, another one of my “should be bottled” scents. I do not love, and in fact really detest, the smell of that perfume – the one it seems every Russian woman owns. In this neighborhood the air is thick with it, the kind of perfume that sticks to the back of your throat and makes your eyes sting. Ladies, less is more.

Finally this week, the heat returned to NY - yay! Today is a little chilly, but I'm starting to get that feeling in my gut; the same one that appeared when school was almost out for summer. OK I admit it - the same one I get when I hear DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince - Summertime ;-) I know come September I'll be praying for snow, but I'm just going to sit here a little longer and enjoy the tease that is Springtime in the City.

It is 701 years today since one of the greatest Scottish warriors was crowned King of Scotland. I grew up in Dumfriesshire, famous for amongst other things, the cave where after suffering defeat, Robert the Bruce went into hiding in 1313. He spent three months living a solitary existence at a time when The Wars of Independence were at their bleakest for the Scots, While evading capture by Edward Longshanks the first of England. Whilst in the cave and at the depths of despair, King Robert happened to watch a spider attempting to build a web - the spider would spin then fall, get up and spin again and again relentlessly until it eventually made the web. This gave Robert heart and is reputed to be the birth of the saying - If at first you don't succeed try, try and try again. King Robert then went forth from the cave on Cove estate, raised an army and won the Historic Battle of Bannockburn in 1314 - even though he was outnumbered ten to one. He established his claim to the throne and thus the beginning of freedom for Scotland. This photo is of the beautiful Loch Linnhe. There's something amazing about the sunsets in Scotland, and they're even better while drinking a cocktail such as the Scottish Sunset! Mix 4oz OJ, 1/2 Orange liqueur, 1 oz coconut rum, 1 oz grenadine, 1 oz scotch, add slices of lime and orange, and enjoy.

I watched “300” on IMAX two weeks ago, with my good friend Dino, a real Spartan no less! Tonight, I watched it again. There’s something about Spartans and Highlanders , I relate - we are one. Warriors. I immediately recognized the lead actor as being Scottish. There was something about the way he said “down’ and ‘done”( and if your Scottish, you'll know what I mean) - it reminded me of my elder brother, Ross, who has lived in Paisley, Scotland for the past 14 years. As soon as I got home from watching the movie, I googled the lead, and found out that sure enough, he is Paisley-bred. I feel complete. Somehow being able to recognize your own, makes you feel “one” with it all. Some of the greatest movie quotes of all time are now part of the history of this film, - “Spartans, tonight, we dine in hell!”, - “Give them nothing! But take from them everything!”, “Then we will fight in the shade.”, and my personal favorite “Madness? This is Sparta!” You can use this everyday – if you can’t be on time – “I’M LATE? - >:-O THIS IS SPARTA!”, or “I FORGOT YOUR BIRTHDAY? – “>:-O THIS IS SPARTA”, I promise.. it will work. Oh and to all who are interested, I have three brothers who all bare a striking resemblance to Gerard Butler ;-)

And you thought today was just another day? Today in history : 1513 - Don Juan Ponce de Leon, a former governor of Puerto Rico, discovered Florida. He claimed the land for Spain; 1657 - France and England formed an alliance against Spain; 1794 - Josiah G. Pierson patented a rivet machine; 1808 - Napoleon's brother Joseph took the throne of Spain; 1836 - The coin press was invented by Franklin Beale; 1840-The first successful photo of the Moon was taken; 1857 - Elisha Otis installed the first modern passenger elevator in a public building. It was at the corner of Broome Street and Broadway in New York City; 1858 - Eleazer A. Gardner patented the cable streetcar; 1861 - London's first tramcars began operations; 1868-The University of California was founded in Oakland, CA; 1881 - The Boers and Britain signed a peace accord ending the first Boer war; 1889 - U.S. President Harrison opened Oklahoma for white colonization, 1901 - Dame Nellie Melba, revealed the secret of her now famous toast; 1903 - The Wright brothers obtained an airplane patent; 1909 - British Lt. Shackleton found the magnetic South Pole; 1912 - The Dixie Cup was invented; 1918 - Lithuania proclaimed independence; 1919 - Benito Mussolini founded his Fascist political movement in Milan, Italy; 1951 - U.S. paratroopers descended from flying boxcars in a surprise attack in Korea; 1957 - The U.S. Army sold the last of its homing pigeons; 1965 - America's first two-person space flight took off from Cape Kennedy with astronauts Virgil I. Grissom and John W. Young aboard. The craft was the Gemini 3; 1972 - Evel Knievel broke 93 bones after successfully jumping 35 cars; 1983 - U.S. President Reagan first proposed development of technology to intercept enemy missiles. The proposal became known as the Strategic Defense Initiative and "Star Wars; 1989 - A 1,000-foot diameter asteroid missed Earth by 500,000 miles; 1989 - Two electrochemists, Stanley Pons and Martin Fleischman, announced that they had created nuclear fusion in a test tube at room temperature. Wow, no ordinary day (according to www.on-this-day.com)

Sometimes I feel so happy about my life that I squeal. Not even just inside, actually out loud. Frightening! I think it’s so important to find happiness in the small things. Things that happen everyday. Like when I see the woodpecker on the tree, or the possum at night. I even got excited about having two raccoons fighting in my garden earlier this week. In the middle of Brooklyn no less! Children are the easiest examples in the pursuit of everyday happiness. The way my 1 yr old daughter’s nose wrinkles when she grins. My 2yr old boy’s “joker” smile, ear to ear. My eldest daughters loud hearty laugh – I glow inside. The way the first extra dark Swiss chocolate truffle just melts, when it touches my tongue, and the fact that despite my addiction to the above I still have a body shaped like a fender. Then there’s the fact that after 3 years of marriage and two babies in two years - my husband still can’t keep his hands off me, not that I’d ever want to stop him. That’s another thing – the feeling of unbridled passion and a love so deep you feel it in every move he makes; every single time I catch a glimpse of him. Just now I am completely absorbed in my boutique. Planning color schemes, furniture, and searching for the perfect things to sell, is just so exciting. All in all, the kind of happiness I have right now gives me that sick feeling in my gut, that drives me on, and no matter what I’m dealt, I can handle it. I believe if everyone looks at the small things and takes pleasure in them, life can be sweeter. Pass it on.

New Year – new questions… Not the “who am I - why am I here” variety, oh no - much more serious than that! More like “what is my signature perfume, and why can’t I find a style of dressing that is me”? Or here’s one – what drink am I? Am I a light beer or a martini?; and why can’t I make up my mind and stick to it long enough to be that me? Tonight I am a light beer, jeans tucked into over the knee boots, black T kind of girl.. But this girl is wearing Chanel No. 5. Doesn’t add up does it? I want to be the chic sassy lady a la Kidman or Monroe for that matter, who slept in this scent… but alas it just isn’t me. So do I go back to Armani, and keep the boots? Do I drink a margarita with that look? I mean really, none of this matters to anyone but me, right? And yet to me it feels like if I can’t even work out what my “look”, drink or scent is, then how do I find myself?… So that takes me back to the who am I question, I thought I wasn’t asking myself. I thought by the time I was heading toward the big 30, I would be a sorted individual. I believed I would have found the look, the drink, the real deal – the real me. I was wrong. I bought Dita’s book today, but only because the “Team” shirts aren’t out yet.

Last nights fortune cookie read "I'm not afraid of storms, for I'm learning to sail my ship." As the year draws to a close, I am not viewing its passing as a year lost, but rather a year gained - in knowledge, love and life. I wish you all a Happy New Year, and hope you get the best of the best in the year to come.

We put our Christmas tree up this week. I love winter, the smell of pine trees, crisp sparkling snow. I also adore wolves, bears, the wilderness, the Aurora Borealis… I knew even before I went, that I would LOVE Alaska. We honeymooned there in 2004. Mere words cannot do justice to its raw, untamed beauty. On a boat trip into the Kenai Fjords we saw orca and humpback whales, otters and porpoises frolicking amongst the ice and inky blue depths. As we sailed up close to a glacier, a chunk of ice sheered away and crashed into the water; the resulting wave slapped into the boat, causing us to rock violently back and forth. Very exciting! Very scary! One day we flew in a light aircraft into the wilds, past the majestic Mount McKinley, snow topped even in August. We landed on a lake, and rowed in a tiny boat towards shore, where we watched black bears fishing for salmon, and encountered a friendly (or hungry!) brown bear, who swam right past us. It was amazing. As is this little known fact: Alaska law says that you can't look at a moose from an airplane. That’s pretty a-moose-ing isn’t it. Moving on.. Just in time for Christmas, I offer you “The Swimming Bear”, mounted in white, size 14x11 for $100. This is a limited edition of just 20 prints. If you are interested please email me for further details. All proceeds go to the Children of Hope Foundation, a non-profit organization located on Long Island. With the help of donations they provide dignified burials for abandoned babies at the Cemetery of the Holy Rood in Westbury. The Children of Hope Foundation advocates the Safe Haven Law, which was first passed in New York in 2000. According to the Safe Haven Law, a birth mother is allowed to relinquish custody of her child in a safe manner, and not be criminally liable for abandonment. A Safe Haven is a designated public place, such as a hospital, firehouse, EMS station or police precinct where a baby can be left, in a safe condition, so that it may be permanently cared for.

“Just give in to the ocean, the only way to tame your fear, is to feel her rocky motion” Maybe it’s because I grew up a stone’s throw from the rolling seas of Scotland that I’ve always loved the ocean. It’s got a hold on me that’s totally unshakable. It comforts my mind and soothes my soul. When I need to clear my thoughts, the only place to be is staring out at the murky indigo water, lapping back and forth. When I fight with loved ones, and salty tears abound, there is solace there. When I go jogging beside it in the morning, I inhale its energy and somehow I can run faster, breathe more deeply. When I lived in Los Angeles I would sit on the empty winter beach in Santa Monica, staring out at the Pacific, looking for answers to questions that would otherwise go unanswered. I would see shapes turn into shadows, turn into nothing, but maybe something. Being Scottish I am enthralled by folklore. When reading Seal-Folk and Ocean Paddlers - Sliochd nan Ròn by John MacAulay, I was suddenly transported to another time, huddled next to a fire, listening to his tales of the magical seal people of the Orkney and Shetland Isles in the far north of Scotland. The tale is that seals could assume human form, but could not return to the sea without their sealskin belts. It is believed that the male Selkies are responsible for storms and also for the sinking of ships, which is their way of avenging the hunting of seals. I just spoke to my mother in Scotland. She held the phone to the wind, which was, she said, an icy gust coming in from the Firth. Suddenly I felt as though I was there, beside the water, with the wind whipping through my hair, whilst I drew strength from the eternal motion of the lashing waves.

In light of recent events, here is the glorious Monica Bellucci, and some thoughts. Maybe in sharing these, I will put to rest some demons of my own. Some facts. I am a mother of 3. I am not Demi Moore. I do not have a personal trainer in my basement 24/7. Nor do I have a nutritionist on standby. I do have good common sense. Like knowing that if I exercise and eat less I will maintain a good, healthy weight. But like most women, every day I fight a war with the mirror. In the past I have suffered from very unhealthy eating patterns. Disorders. Cliché as it is, women and girls all round the world, right now, are “dying to be thin”. Literally. The sad news of yet another model dying last week, should be, but will not be, a wake up call to women everywhere. And yes, the age-old cry of the absolutely fabulous, “you can never be too rich or too thin” is a lie. In the past couple of months 2 models have died because they were simply too thin. Thinking one can exist on diet soda and lettuce, is not really thinking at all. What happened to the hourglass figure? Where have all the Marilyns gone? The same girl consuming 0 calories a day is the same girl wearing the pin up girl t-shirts, and cinching their waists with big belts, trying desperately to create curves. Why not just have curves? Women are women after all, not men. What is wrong with being 5’ 7” and a size 8? This I ask myself everyday, and yet still, I wonder what it’s like to be the size 2s I see on the rack. Do those girls have a better life than me? I seriously doubt it. Are they happier than me? Probably not. After all, I get to eat a few slices of pizza now and again, and not spend the next hour in the bathroom, wasting time amongst other things. I get to experience the scientifically proven mood enhancing chocolate, and the “good for your heart” red wine… without working out like a mad woman in order to get rid of those extra, unwanted calories. After all these years of being miserable on a diet, trying to be something, in all likelihood, I won’t ever be, I can now try to be content with who and what I am. Which, according to my husband is just about perfect.

With Thanksgiving less than a week away, I thought I should offer up a festive cooking tip. Domestic goddess, Nigella Lawson, knows the best way to roast the big bird is breast down. Suits you sir. And, as it turns out, suits the bird too. I am yet to get a dry turkey breast. And, for your enjoyment, here is the yummy mummy at her finest.

In school I studied Toulouse-Lautrec, and long before seeing the girls in his Moulin Rouge works, I yearned to be on stage. To work in theatre darling! I wanted to be the high kicker, with feathers in my hair and on my tail! There’s just something about a fishnet-clad thigh that makes a girl think that she too, can be that girl. Hands on hips, smile a mile wide, center stage – yes, that will be me. My newest adventure, here in the big smoke is, drum roll - I want to be a Rockette. I have set my goal. I have my plan, my dreams, that’s all anyone needs. When I was a little girl I would watch old films with my Grandmother; the musical “42nd Street” was a favorite. For those who have never seen the original 1930s film, you simply must. Here’s the deal: Unknown chorus girl steps in, to play lead in musical, and shines. I remember just before she takes the stage the director utters, "You're going out there a kid, but you've got to come back a star!" As I head towards my 29th year I realize that I walk around in an adult's body, feeling 5 years old most of the time. I act out things that adults do, but that’s all it ever feels like, an act, sometimes not even a good one. But, I learn, I become wiser. That’s all being an adult is, being wiser, not about gaining years, more about gaining knowledge. So there it is. I don’t want to be a star; I want to experience being a star. And maybe I’ll grow wiser in the process. And until the time comes for me to take high kicking center stage, I continue to rehearse this thing called life. And I can always look like a star until then, with the new line from OPI!. Maybe a feather in my hair on New Year's Eve. Fishnets for day - not a problem. So tap class here I come!

"Come and meet those dancing feet on the avenue I'm taking you to...Forty-Second Street."