Wednesday, August 8, 2007

Not waving

Being single, for me gave me a constant feeling of drowning. Being married is like coming ashore. I still get to sit on the sand and look out to the ocean, and remember the times when I was able to keep my head above water. But thank goodness I'm not gasping for breath anymore. One of my brothers painted a picture for my Mum a few years ago of a guy with his arm up, in the middle of the ocean. He called it "Not waving, but drowning", after the poem by Stevie Smith. For me being on my own was definitely like this. He recently ended a longterm relationship with a good friend of mine, and I worry for him. It's funny how I feel great about my other 2 brothers, both in relationships, but feel scared for the one who's single. Is it ever possible to distance our own feelings about something enough to see others can survive in that situation? I hope as I get older and wiser I learn to, because it's hard worrying about someone who is only 2 years younger than me.

EDIT: My single brother is not single anymore, so much so that he's on holiday with his girlfriend on a remote Scottish island - WHY AM I ALWAYS THE LAST TO KNOW!?! Hey but at least I feel good about him again :)

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